Welcome to the first edition of “Dear Bulldog.” Do you have any dilemmas in your life that you need perspective on, support on a variety of topics, or maybe even somewhere to rant a quick story time? “Dear Bulldog” is the place for you! In this column, we take two responses from anonymous students each week and try our best to solve your problem to the best of our ability.

“Dear Bulldog” assures that students responding to the column get real, genuine advice from other students. We get it–it’s hard to get advice from friends or adults sometimes, and that’s why we started this column. Responders will get unbiased advice from anonymous Bulldog Times writers. Who knows, maybe a question you have will be answered here someday.

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Dear Bulldog,

I really like this one guy and I’m pretty sure he likes me too but we only text and kind of never talk in person and I don’t even know if he’s allowed to date. What do I do? Do I just keep him around or drop him or stay ‘friends’ or like I don’t know. HELP ME PLEASE.”

From,
capybarra

Dear capybarra,

If one thing’s for sure from your letter, situationships are definitely never easy and it’s tough trying to figure out how the other person feels. If you guys only text and barely talk in person, it’s hard to know if there’s actually something real there. Next time you see him, perhaps try talking to him and see how he acts. Try to find something that you guys can bond over–annoying assignments, online trends, or even some drama within mutual friends.

It’s also definitely important to figure out if he could date or not. If you’re uncomfortable with asking him directly, try to find a discreet way to figure out if he has a dating history–you’ll most likely get your answer there. If he isn’t allowed, you’ll have to decide if you’re okay with just being friends or if it’s better to move on.

At the end of the day, if you’re constantly overthinking and not getting any clear answers, that’s already an answer in itself. Everyone deserves something that feels transparent and fun, not something that makes you question everything. Trust your instincts, you got this!

Best of luck,
Bulldog

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Dear Bulldog,

PLEASE HELP ME. So, my friend has liked one of our mutual friends for a while now. At first, I didn’t think anything of it, but over time, I’ve started developing feelings for him too. I don’t want to hurt my friend, but I can’t help how I feel. What should I do? We all have the same English period so we see each other everyday, but I also have the same math period as him, so I see him more than my best friend. I really value my friendship with her but I can’t help but think of what our relationship could be. I feel like he might like me back. Should I try to move on for the sake of my friend who liked him first or should I tell him how I feel?

From,
Friendship Fumber

Dear FriendshipFumbler,

I can only imagine how difficult (and awkward) that situation must be! It’s never easy when boys muddle your friendships, especially when there’s room for someone to get hurt.

First and foremost, if you truly value your friendship with this girl, honesty and communication should be your priority. Before making any moves with this guy, I think you should have a conversation with your friend. It can be pretty tempting to focus on whether or not this guy reciprocates your feelings, but it’s equally as important to think about how pursuing these feelings might hurt your friendship.

On one hand, if she’s super into this dude, she might feel hurt by your sudden admission. On the other hand, if she’s willing to discuss this situation with you in a mature manner, it’s possible to come out of this situation without losing your friendship. Relationships are confusing, and feelings don’t always come at the most convenient times.

If you believe there’s a real connection with this guy, and your friend is willing to have an honest conversation about it, then being upfront might be the best path forward. But if you sense that pursuing him could damage your friendship, you may need to decide which relationship matters more to you. Whatever you choose, I think the best thing to do is take on the situation with complete honesty and what you believe is right in your heart of hearts.

Sincerely,
Bulldog

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